Conversations With a Soldier

When I first started talking to my brother, Kris, about his experiences as a soldier in Afghanistan I promised him that I would not blog about it. He said that I could blog if I wished, but I could not make the blog political. So here I am, blogging about Afghanistan in a non-political way, trying to be as objective as possible and probably failing because Kris, my brother, is at war.

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Initially, I felt timid and very hesitant to broach any of the many serious subjects one can inquire about when talking to a soldier, so I started simple. I asked him if it is hot or cold over in Afghanistan. Now, this is a stupid question, but I give him credit for answering it without being too much of a smart ass. Kris responded as wryly as he could muster using text by saying "It's hot during the summer and cold in the winter... but always cold at night." 

Seeing that I would have to step up my game to keep us both engaged in this conversation, I  decided to pick it up and ask some real questions. With a slight bit more confidence I followed up by asking what the atmosphere around camp was like when they are not on a mission. This was only the second time Kristofer and I had spoken since he shipped to Afghanistan so I didn't really expect much from him in this conversation, but he gave a more detailed response than I had bargained for. "You have to constantly be on your toes... even if you are in a 'safe' place there's always the chance that they will try to overrun you... or mortar you. But you are able to joke around a little during that time, too. You have to have a pretty morbid sense of humor."

My next question was about the atmosphere when on a mission, and whether or not they run day and night, because I only think of things happening during the day. I informed him that every time I imagine him in a fight out there I always see it as a movie. "We run missions day and night," he wrote. "It doesn't matter. Sometimes we step light and sometimes we don't (mission depending). I suppose it would be like a movie if you were on the outside looking in, but when you're in a firefight there is nothing Hollywood about it."

Kristofer Wedekind

 Really feeling my oats now I asked him how often shots are fired. This is a question that I only partly wanted to hear the answer to, and being ever so intuitive I think he got a sense of that, telling me all I need to know in his answer by responding "Often...once a week maybe, give or take. Wanting only to cautiously prod this topic, I asked if every firefight has a fatality, or if there are more surrenders than I imagine. "It ends when one side is dead, they surrender, or they run away. Someone always gets fucked up in a firefight, them or us."

A few moments later Kris asked, "Do you know what its like to be in a firefight?"

Feeling I may have hit a nerve, I wrote that I had no idea what it is like. In an attempt to relate to me the unrelatable, Kristofer wrote "Its Hell... Imagine the most terrified you have ever been and times that by a million. Imagine watching your friend die. Then imagine digging deep, pushing forward, and killing ones that would harm you and others you love."

Sensing that it would probably be a good idea to switch to a more pedestrian question, I asked how often he gets to sleep, and if he has ever hallucinated due to sleep deprivation. He responded, "I've been up for days at a time...no hallucinations here. There is a saying in the army 'Stay alert, stay alive'. You have to live by it! The second you let your guard down you die. My brother next to me depends on me staying alert and not being complacent. If I let him down he could die."

My last question was how often he got to partake in any type of entertainment. Television, movies, boardgames, sports, music, etc. "Lol," he wrote, "every chance I get... not often...I watched a little bit of tombstone on my buddies laptop earlier...with no sound. no games really... uh ping pong sometimes...cards blackjack poker dominoes spades...that's about it."

After answering this question Kris informed me that he had to go get some sleep before his next day, and presumably, mission. Disappointed that our talk was over for now, I accepted that he had to go to sleep so that he would be better prepared for the next day, and we said our goodbyes for the evening.

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Depending on reader response, I hope that Conversations With a Soldier becomes part of a series. Given the nature of Kris' and I's correspondence the chances of that happening are very hit or miss, so we will see. If any of you guys have a question for my brother, feel free to post it in the comments and I would love to ask him for you the next time I get a chance, and it may be used in a post like this one.

I hope you had a happy Memorial Day, and God bless our troops, past and present.

As always I fully encourage any criticism, advice, suggestions, or general discussion in the comment area.
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